1 Timothy 3:4
One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity;
Original Language Analysis
τοῦ
G3588
τοῦ
Strong's:
G3588
Word #:
1 of 12
the (sometimes to be supplied, at others omitted, in english idiom)
ἰδίου
his own
G2398
ἰδίου
his own
Strong's:
G2398
Word #:
2 of 12
pertaining to self, i.e., one's own; by implication, private or separate
οἴκου
house
G3624
οἴκου
house
Strong's:
G3624
Word #:
3 of 12
a dwelling (more or less extensive, literal or figurative); by implication, a family (more or less related, literally or figuratively)
προϊστάμενον
One that ruleth
G4291
προϊστάμενον
One that ruleth
Strong's:
G4291
Word #:
5 of 12
to stand before, i.e., (in rank) to preside, or (by implication) to practise
ἔχοντα
having
G2192
ἔχοντα
having
Strong's:
G2192
Word #:
7 of 12
to hold (used in very various applications, literally or figuratively, direct or remote; such as possession; ability, contiuity, relation, or conditio
Cross References
Titus 1:6If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly.1 Timothy 3:12Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.Genesis 18:19For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.Titus 2:2That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience.Acts 10:2A devout man, and one that feared God with all his house, which gave much alms to the people, and prayed to God alway.Joshua 24:15And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.Titus 2:7In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity,
Historical Context
The oikos (household) was the basic unit of Greco-Roman society, including extended family, servants, and dependents. In a culture where paternal authority was absolute (patria potestas), Paul redefines household management in gospel terms—dignified, respectful leadership that points to God's fatherhood. The elder's family becomes a microcosm of church health.
Questions for Reflection
- How does gospel-centered family leadership differ from both permissiveness and authoritarianism?
- Why is public ministry effectiveness so closely tied to private family relationships?
- What does 'dignity' (semnotēs) in household management look like practically?
Analysis & Commentary
One that ruleth well his own house (τοῦ ἰδίου οἴκου καλῶς προϊστάμενον, tou idiou oikou kalōs proistamenon)—literally 'managing/leading his own household well.' The verb proistēmi means to lead, direct, care for—not domineering tyranny but benevolent leadership.
Having his children in subjection with all gravity (ἐν ὑποταγῇ μετὰ πάσης σεμνότητος, en hypotagē meta pasēs semnotētos)—children in submission 'with all dignity.' The semnotēs (dignity, seriousness) applies to both father and children—the household reflects godly order through respectful relationships, not mere authoritarianism.
The logic is clear: if a man cannot lead his own small flock, how can he shepherd God's church? Family life is the proving ground for pastoral ministry. Titus 1:6 adds that children should be believers 'not accused of riot or unruly'—the elder's home demonstrates the transforming power of the gospel.